Angry Consumer Democracy: The Fightback
Recently my customer service experiences have been the worst
of my entire life. I have been left with my blood boiling, teeth grinding and
murder in my eyes. Offenders included the Royal Mail, London Underground, Tesco, Automat, Royal Greenwich Council, South Eastern Trains, M&S, Santander and serial fuck-up BT.
Rather than bore you with each complaint in turn I preferred to write about
where I think it all went wrong and how we can get good service back.
Good
customer service is not exclusively served by dead-eyed, smiling Americans in
Disney-esque uniforms. It is not something false, over-the-top or designed to
illicit gratuities. It has been a method of adding value to a customers
interactions with a business. These failing individuals are the faces of the
business and when they mishandle our requests they damage the reputation of the
company. Good service creates the illusion that a company cares and bad service
shows the reality of a company that doesn't.
I
think 'sorry' is the hardest word. I know for a fact some big companies
instruct their staff to 'never say sorry' or use any words that could imply
they are accepting responsibility! Apparently an apology of any kind implies
fault is with the company rather than the customer. 'Thank you', when the
exhasperated caller gives up, is still permitted at least. I believe it is this
unwillingness to accept responsibility that is the source of the problem.
Saying sorry implies a 'weakness' and bigger companies are inherently
masculine, heterosexual monoliths that must never show vulnerability. The top
dog won't apologise to the board, the board don't apologise to the managers,
the managers don't apologise to the workers and the workers piss off the
customers. Where is the humility, self depreciation, common manners and desire
to help? Sadly they are lost and might not be making a return until the
customers start a fight back.
But
what are we fighting for? Well, companies need to better train staff, encourage
lateral thinking and problem solving. They must ask their staff if they have
the tools they need to keep the customers happy, satisfied and prepared to stay
with the company. If they give the training but not the tools then we'll have
an army of lovely, polite, helpful workers unable to actually do anything to
help. Maybe a step in the right direction, but an inconsequential one in
butt-ugly shoes.
And
how do we start the revolution? We can force them to take notice by complaining
at every opportunity and switching service when we are not satisfied. Don't put
up with their shit and fuck their bollocks 12 month contracts. If you are
unhappy with their shoddy service you can demand your way out of any contract.
Trust me, I do it all the time. Be melodramatic in your rage and enjoy the
fracas. Tell them you will seek legal advice, ask their name, take notes, say
you'll write to watchdog, your MP, the police and the Daily Mail. Demand
satisfaction and don't give up. Encourage everyone you know to ditch them and
then go out and berrate them to total strangers on the street. If you blog,
blog about them. If you tweet, tweet about them. Make noise and you will be
heard.
To
change a government you get one poxy vote in a school basement once every four
years but to change a company that craps on you from the sky you can complain
daily. You can take your hard earned cash and splash it with their competitors
and you can rubbish their reputation to everyone you meet. Our glorious
democratic right to complain about substandard, rancid customer service is
endless. Revel in this one liberty and watch as angry consumer democracy brings
about lasting change.
I have faith the day will come when I can call BT and hang up the phone happy, satisfied and calm. We can make this happen!
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